Friday, March 7, 2008

IVF Update

I had my appointment this morning for my Ultrasound and blood work.
I have a giant cyst on my right overy. Most likely, I will not be doing IVF this month.
I have to wait to hear from them after they get my blood work results to make any decisions.

I'm completely devastaed. I have no faith in this anymore.
I did everything right this month. EVERYTHING!
I was the healthiest I've ever been.
Every time I start to have some hope, some major set back happens.
I don't think I can do this anymore. I don't have it in me to keep going through this.
I don't understand why I keep getting more crap. Have I not been through enough already.
I mean lets look at what I've been through.........
-3 years of TTC
-multiple fertility tests
-Numerous negative pregnancy tests
-Surgery
-2 months of Lupron
-$30,000 in medical bills in 2008 ($4500 over the other two years)
-Fertility meds
-Multiple Ultrasounds
-watching people getting their SECOND BFP's while waiting for mine
-watching every person in hollywood get pregnant
-watching all these trashy people abuse and kill their childre that they dont want
-and now a big fat cyst!
When the fuck is it enough!

2 comments:

Erin said...

You can do this Barb. You are SO close. Don't give up now.

Emily said...

I'm so sorry Barb! (((hugs)))