Is this the medicine or are you really upset??

This is the question my husband asked me tonight. Why?
Because I'm upset. I had a really crappy day. Full of being denied for various things such as a line of credit to my checking account and my van inspection. Neither are a big deal I realize. I took more money out my 401K, so I don't need the line of credit any longer, but I'm upset about being denied for it. I was denied because my husband has destroyed his credit and as hard as I've worked on fixing it, it's not good enough yet. The van is no big deal either really. I just need two new tires. Normally, no biggy. However, considering I'm scraping every fucking penny I can right now to pay for this IVF so I can have something that SO many people get for free, $100 for new tires is yet another set back in my charmed financial life.
I'm just sick of the set backs. I'm sick of taking two steps forward and having something knock me on my ass again.
I'm pissed that my mom has not offered one penny to help us out. I know they are not loaded, but they could afford to give us something. My mom pays $200 a month towards my nieces cathlic school, yet after hearing about our struggle for money, she's offered us nothing.
My dad told me to take a loan from Arch Tech. He'd give me money even if he was broke. He'd take a loan out for me if needed. Again, I don't need the money anymore, but I'm so happy at least HE offered it to me.

I so badly wanted to come home and talk to someone. I know that I can't talk to my husband. He just doesn't ever understand anything that I'm upset about. EVER. Of course I don't NEED him to understand. I need him to hug me and tell me it's ok. BUT nope. He says "Well, I'm going to go in the other room and let you calm down". WTF?? Seriously? He can NEVER comfort me.
Then when I say "I don't NEED to be left along" he said "Is the the Medicine or are you upset about something else. BEcause I don't get it and I don't know what you want me to do."
Nice. Do nothing you fucking schmuck! Do NOTHING! That will make it better!

I miss my friend. I miss talking to her on the phone. I miss the relationship I used to have with her. I don't why certain things in life have to change. I understand change. I just don't get this one. I never thought anything would change our friendship. But life did. Life changed it. I doubt it will ever be what it was. And that hurts so much.

So now, I have to blog my frustrating days because my husband doesnt get it. Doesn't even try to. I don't know who else to talk to.

I am thankful for my online friends. I've met some great people online. It's the one positive thing about my fertility issues. I've met some truely wonderful women. I wouldn't trade that for the world.

This has just been a really shitty day. I'm probably just going to go to bed.
Maybe it is the medicine. Or maybe it's just the fact that I'm sick and tired of getting the really shitty cards dealt to me. Like the infertility card wasn't bad enough, keep throwing more shitty cards to me. Obviously you think I can handle it. Guess we'll wait and see.