Dreams

So, last night I had a dream I was pregnant. Not only was I pregnant, I was pregnant with TWINS. I don't know if it happened naturally or via IVF, but there I was in the Hospital with Russ laying on a bed waiting to get checked out by a nurse. I had a big contraction and then some little ones and thought I was in labor. Turns out it was just Braxton Hicks and I still probably had a week to go. The nurse said "So, what are we having?" and I responded with "Two of something, not sure if they are boys or girls". This is how I know it was a dream, because I'm not patient enough to wait until birth to find out the sex of my baby/babies.
The nurse said I could go home and to come back once my water broke.
I looked over at Russ and and said "I'm too big to go home. Can I just stay here until these babies come out?" I was rubbing my very BIG belly at the time.
That was it. That was the end of my dream. I have not had a dream that I was pregnant in like a year! I woke up so happy. Even though I wasn't pregnant in real life, it was nice to rub my pregnant belly even if only in my dreams.


12 MORE DAYS!!!
Until I move! I finished up a lot of packing this weekend. Really all I have left is the kitchen. And not a lot in the kitchen. Just pots and pans and plates and bowls. I've packed the majority of the pantry. I've packed all but 4 coffee cups and 4 regular glasses. I really have nothing left to do in the next 12 days. I guess that's nice because once I move, I'm going to have a TON of stuff to do. It feels so good to be this far ahead of the game.


I just passed the 2 year mark of trying to get pregnant. I've been on my Lupron shot for almost a month. I have hot flashes daily and I'm still spotting. However, I don't have mood swings. Well, I am more emotional sometimes. I cry when I see pregnant people. I cry when I hear about someone getting pregnant. I cry when I see new baby pic or belly pics on EB. This is why I joined Jen's new site http://fertilitychallenged.myfreeforum.org/index.php . It's pretty much the same as our EB site but with out all the new mom sections. I'm so happy for all the new moms on EB, but it's really really tough to read about everyones expeiriences when your defective. I will not have a chance to even try to get pregnant until probably October or November and right now, I just can't go on EB much. It is so painful. I don't know how to explain it. I'm happy for them, but I ache so much inside that I just can't look anymore. I'm still going to lurk on EB, and I'll be excited for everybody on there, but I need a site with mostly infertile people. I think it will help me cope over the next few months.

Well, enough updates. I need to do some work!